- Carrin Adoma
- Jul 14
- 3 min read
Updated: Nov 16
The Truth About Adult ADHD
ADHD Is Not Just Forgetfulness — It’s a Different Way of Being
Written By: Carrin Adoma
Why So Many Adults Are Just Now Connecting the Dots?
A lot of adults are walking around thinking they’re just “bad at life”, struggling with deadlines, zoning out during conversations, juggling a million mental tabs, and blaming it all on poor discipline, anxiety, or burnout. But sometimes, what we’re calling overwhelm, laziness, or scatteredness is actually ADHD: a brain wired for stimulation, creativity, and depth, but often misunderstood in a world that expects linear focus and rigid productivity (Kooij et al., 2019).
Adult ADHD isn’t always loud or obvious. It doesn’t always look like hyperactivity or bouncing off the walls. Sometimes it looks like missed texts, time blindness, or not knowing where you put your keys (again).
What It Feels Like
ADHD affects many areas of life, from completing tasks and managing time to regulating emotions (Barkley, 2011). It can mean starting five projects and finishing none, feeling emotionally overwhelmed by small issues, or experiencing a constant mental buzz. You might find yourself doing everything at once… or nothing at all.
The hardest part? Feeling like everyone else got a manual for life, and you didn’t.
Why It’s Often Missed
ADHD is often associated with hyperactive children, especially boys. But in adults, it tends to be internalized and masked by coping strategies like perfectionism, overthinking, and people-pleasing (Nadeau et al., 2015). Many adults with ADHD are high-achieving, emotionally sensitive, and deeply intuitive, and still feel constantly overwhelmed. They believe they are the problem, rather than recognizing the impact of their neurological wiring.
Because so many have learned to “get by,” they assume the struggle is personal, not neurobiological.
You’re Not Failing, You’re Just Wired Differently!
Let’s be clear: ADHD is not a character flaw. It’s a neurological difference in how your brain processes information, motivation, time, and emotion (Ramsay & Rostain, 2015).
It’s why “just make a list” doesn’t work.
It’s why routines fall apart after two days.
It’s why emotional regulation can feel like a rollercoaster.
When we stop judging ourselves through a neurotypical lens, everything starts to make more sense. That’s when we can give ourselves permission to stop fixing, and start understanding.
What Helps
What doesn’t help is shame, rigid structure, or trying to “force” yourself into systems that don’t fit.
What does help:
Compassionate structure (not punishment-based schedules)
Visual tools and body-based cues to manage time and tasks
Regulating your nervous system before trying to be productive (Weiss et al., 2010)
Working with your brain instead of against it
Being seen and supported by someone who understands ADHD
There’s no one-size-fits-all fix, but there are pathways forward that bring more clarity.
Let’s Talk About It
If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.
At Therapy Uninterrupted, we support adults navigating ADHD, emotional overwhelm, and burnout with practical tools, compassion, and care. Whether you’re just starting to explore ADHD or you’re ready to find a new rhythm that actually works for you, we’re here to help.
You’re not too much. You’re not a mess.
You’re just ready to feel understood.
If you're ready to start a new turn in your journey finding ways to support your brain, book a free video consultation with me. If you need a bit more time before booking, we've included some resources below that might be helpful while you wait!
References
Barkley, R. A. (2011). Executive functions: What they are, how they work, and why they evolved. Guilford Press.
Kooij, J. J. S., Bijlenga, D., Salerno, L., Jaeschke, R., Bitter, I., Balázs, J., … & Asherson, P. (2019). Updated European Consensus Statement on diagnosis and treatment of adult ADHD. European Psychiatry, 56, 14–34. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.eurpsy.2018.11.001
Nadeau, K. G., Quinn, P. O., & Brown, T. E. (2015). Understanding women with AD/HD (2nd ed.). Advantage Books.
Ramsay, J. R., & Rostain, A. L. (2015). The adult ADHD toolkit: Using CBT to facilitate coping inside and out. Routledge.
Weiss, M., Murray, C., Wasdell, M., Greenfield, B., Giles, L., Hechtman, L., & Veldhuizen, S. (2010). A randomized controlled trial of CBT therapy for adults with ADHD with and without medication. BMC Psychiatry, 10(1), 24. https://doi.org/10.1186/1471-244X-10-24
Further Reading & Resources
How to ADHD (YouTube) – Educational and relatable videos on living with ADHD
ADHD Self-Report Scale (ASRS v1.1) – Free screening tool
