- Volha Shelepava
- 6 days ago
- 2 min read
How Does Therapy Work?
How The Analogy of the Sponge Can Help Conceptualize What Therapy is All About
Written By: Volha Shelepava
Where We Begin
We are born as a soft sponge that absorbs everything easily and without doubt. We see our mother's smile and decide that we are good and loved. We see someone’s frowning face and think that we are bad. Childhood is the best time to soak up love, warmth, and care. Childhood is also the time when it is easiest to soak up fear and self-doubt.
How Things Shift
With age, the “sponge” becomes hard and does not absorb new things so easily, especially if the new things are different from what is already inside. Sometimes the sponge becomes completely hard and it becomes almost impossible to absorb anything new.
Where Therapy Comes In
Therapy is an attempt to soften, squeeze, and fill up the sponge again. And no, not the theories, diagnoses, exercises, and neat logical conclusions - these are not the most important in the therapeutic process. What actually matters more than any of these things is the space between the therapist and the client is that very “life-giving moisture” that cannot be replaced by any theory. Remember the movie “Good Will Hunting” with Robin Williams in the leading role? This is ideally how therapy supposed to work.
So How Does Therapy Really Work?
Why does therapy last so long? The answer is easy. We need a lot of time to “soak a sponge” that has been drying out for years and then fill it with new content. It takes time, strength and courage to meet with yourself and absorb something radically new and opposite to what has filled us for years.
If you have interest and desire to look at your life and ask yourself, “How can I make myself happier?”, maybe it is time to start therapy. Book a free phone consultation and I promise you a warm, attentive and patient presence that we all need sometimes to reconnect with our true self.